I was scrolling through the internet, and came across this video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AyospsYnjHk&feature=youtu.be
A while back I created a post here of books I wanted to read in 2018, and I’m making my way at a snail’s pace through that list. But as I was listing everything that looked fun to read, it got me thinking about the books I’ve come across that were just…awful…or at the very least not what I thought they would be when I picked them up.
This is my list of Nope Books. And hey, this is all in good fun. I’m not trying to be negative, or bash the author or anything. This is just my own perspective for comedy purposes.
*Spoilers below! Proceed with caution if there is a book listed that you would like to read!
1. NOPE. Ending: A book ending that made you go NOPE either in denial, rage, or simply because the ending was crappy.
The Twilight Series.
Everybody who has read Twilight can at least agree that the final book in that series was just…awful. Bella has a baby with Edward, and Jake imprints on her….Uhm…ew!? Bella develops her vampire power, which is PROTECTION. Yeah….kinda boring. But then again, so was she as a character. I will admit, I was a diehard Twi-Fangirl. Until I read that last book. Now I cringe when I hear the the phrase, “Team Edward or Team Jacob.” Ruined the entire series in my opinion.
2. NOPE. Protagonist: A main character you dislike and drives you crazy.
The Hunger Games.
Now I might be in the minority on this one. But I didn’t like Katniss Everdeen. Firstly, her name is Katniss. Rhymes with Cat Piss anyone? Secondly, she was known for being cold and calculating. Yeah, she was a survivor, and sure she was a very strong female character. But did I like her personally? No. It was even mentioned literally in the book. Peta was the likable one. Katniss wasn’t. I still enjoyed the books for what they were. Good stories. But I wouldn’t invite Katniss to my dinner party.
3. NOPE. Series: A series that turned out to be one huge pile of NOPE. after you’ve invested all of that time and energy on it, or a series you gave up on because it wasn’t worth it anymore.
The Mortal Instruments Series.
I LOVE the first 3 books of this series. They are beautiful. They are funny, scary, romantic, and just really well written. The books that come after? Hell to the no. I bought the 4th book, and didn’t even finish it. I think there are more books now, but I can’t be bothered to read them. It just got so boring and cliche. As far as I’m concerned, there are no more books in the series. It’s just the three.
4. NOPE. Popular pairing: A “ship” you don’t support.
Harry Potter’s Ron & Hermione.
I love Ron. I love Hermione. I just don’t love them together. I’m sure this isn’t a popular opinion. But I would prefer her with Draco or someone less obvious like Neville. Ron can go off into the sunset with Lavender if he likes.
5. NOPE. Plot twist: A plot twist you didn’t see coming or didn’t like.
There’s about 2 good twists in Lord Loss. The first twist is finding out that the main character’s family was a bunch of werewolves, and they have to do chess battles with Lord Loss to save them from turning into mindless animals for the rest of their lives. The second, is that the nerdy, chubby sidekick boy is also a part of this werewolf family. And his soul must be saved as well from Lord Loss. I did not see either of these twists coming, and that second twist in particular threw me. The whole time they had been alluding to someone being a werewolf, but it was actually the quirky, meek little boy that no one would suspect. Go figure.
6. NOPE. Protagonist action/decision: A character decision that made you shake your head NOPE.
Game of Thrones
A lot of people don’t like Sansa Stark in this series. They say she’s selfish, silly, and was the reason for the downfall of the Stark dynasty. And, while all of that may have been true at one point, she was a young girl of (13? 14?). I’m not excusing her actions because they were awful. I’m just saying I also did a lot of stupid shit at that age that I hope no one remembers. I partially blame Eddard Stark for the beginning of the end for his family. He was called to King’s Landing to be the Hand of the King. His honor, and duty to his friend Robert Baratheon drove him to uproot his family to King’s Landing, den of snakes and murderers. Robert asked him to come be his Hand, and while telling a King ‘no’ isn’t typically done, Eddard had a long standing friendship with Robert. He could have told him no thanks in my opinion. But instead, he was swayed by his friend, and honor as Lord of Winterfell to move to a far off land where they had no friends, and were surrounded by enemies to eventually all get killed (mostly).
7. NOPE. Genre: A genre you will never read.
Non-Fiction. If it’s real, I’m not reading it. Give me fantasy. Give me horror. Give me comedy. Give me romance. Just not some historical book about the invention of the printing press because that will put my ass to sleep real quick.
8. NOPE. Book format: Book formatting you hate and avoid buying until it comes out in a different edition
I don’t feel particularly strongly about this category. So I’m just going to skip past it, and hope no one notices.
9. NOPE. Trope: A trope that makes you go NOPE.
Only good looking characters are ‘likeable’. I don’t like the stereotypical, Hollywood painted characters that have god-like bodies who we are supposed to somehow relate to. What about the ugly girl/guy? I’d like to see some main characters that have a large, hooked nose rise up and be the one to defeat the dragon. Or the fat girl with pimples becomes the queen of a nation.
10. NOPE. Recommendation: A book recommendation that is constantly hyped and pushed at you that you simply refuse to read.
Fifty Shades of Grey.
Read the first book. Just for funzies. I regretted it. It was a waste of my time, and mental capacity reading that book, and I refuse to read the others or watch the movies. It isn’t interesting. It’s just bad smut. The characters are cliche. The story is boring.
11. NOPE. Cliche/pet peeve: A cliche or writing pet peeve that always makes you roll your eyes.
‘An orphaned kid is the only one who can defeat the big baddie’ is a pretty overdone cliche. It’s like the trauma of their parents dying gives them the strength to overcome any obstacle. And, while I understand that they are trying to garner sympathy from reader’s and make the character interesting with a rich backstory, the writer should be able to do all of that without killing off the main character’s parents.
12. NOPE. Love interest: The love interest that’s not worthy of being one. A character you don’t think should have been a viable love interest.
The Great Gatsby.
Tom and Daisy Buchanan. *Le sigh* I’m sure we all wanted Daisy to leave Tom and run off with the mysterious Gatsby. Tom was a cheating flirt, and while Daisy wasn’t perfect either I so wanted her and Gatsby to have the romance where they fly off into the wind together on a magic carpet.
13. NOPE. Book: A book that shouldn’t have existed that made you say NOPE.
Mein Kampf. Haven’t read it. Don’t want to read it. It should be set on fire.
14. NOPE. Villain: A scary villain/antagonist you would hate to cross and would make you run in the opposite direction.
The Sandman Series.
This series has a lot of weird, and creepy characters. But the one that stands out is literally Satan. Lucifer is a character in this book, and I would say a big, ‘NOPE’ to that one. I’m not messing around with a fallen angel with a chip on his shoulder.
15. NOPE. Death: A character death that still haunts you.
This is a manga. And manga are technically books. So I’m counting this. But L’s death had me shooketh. I stopped the series. I refused to continue any more without L. I didn’t finish it until years later, and even then it still wasn’t enough to squelch the pain from losing L.
16. NOPE. Author: An author you had a bad experience reading for and have decided to quit.
Stephanie Meyer. Go back to question #1 for the reason why.